Karl Malone Can Be Found On Google Street View Walking His Dog
I found a great story on Reddit/r/nba. User rburp was curious how former NBA MVP Karl Malone lives. Malone lives in Arkansas, the same state the reddit user lives in.
He claims that he has found Malone on Google Street View. He gives a lot of pictures, information and explanations in his post, that are very convincing to me.
It is Malone’s ranch, and by the looks, it could be him. This definitely is my favorite off-season post so far.
via reddit:
“Hi everyone. I didn’t sleep all night because I was coding, and I think my brain finally broke. I learned that he has acreage in Arkansas. Being an Arkansan I was curious about my in-state neighbor, so I got to searching, and I found the address of Malone Properties Inc. (or The Mailman Ranch as I learned it’s called) which I won’t share because of reddit doxxing rules.
I went to Street View to see how a millionaire redneck lives, and I believe I found the man himself. I will now present several reasons that I think strongly support my hypothesis.
I present exhibits A, B, and C
And an unedited screenshot here
Exhibit A is I think the strongest. Those muscles. Look at that forearm. Do you see the tone? The definition? That is the forearm of a 2x MVP. The kind of forearm that would snatch a pass from John Stockton out of midair, and slam it down for two points. The forearm of a renowned hunter, athlete, and outdoors enthusiast.
Exhibit B: That watch. It looks very nice and large. Like the kind of watch a millionaire athlete might own.
Exhibit C: His clothing. I’ll start with the hat. I’ve looked at it closely for quite a while now, and I believe it might say LAL for the Lakers, or might possibly be for LA Tech University where he was a strength & conditioning coach when this photo was taken in 2008. Or maybe LSU. I don’t know for sure. I think it has an L if you squint right though.
Regardless, the whole outfit is very Karl Malone. Almost every photo I found of him online he was wearing a similar getup.
The most important part of his outfit might be his jeans. I noticed that they appear to be ripped, faded, and baggy – a style I don’t typically see on old southern men. Yeah. Let’s get a closeup of those babies And sure enough he appears to love jeans of that style (bonus Lil Wayne). In damn near every informal photo of him I found he’s wearing them (bonus Drizzy – he must like Young Money)
So. I know what you’re thinking. “rburp you said it yourself – he was at LA Tech at the time this was taken. What would he be doing in Arkansas?” Well I looked it up, and Ruston Louisiana, home of the lovely LA Tech campus, is a mere hour drive away from his property. He could easily have traveled back and forth as he pleased.
In conclusion, I believe this to be a photo of Karl Malone sometime in May 2008 in sunny El Dorado Arkansas.